Somebody please help the girl

It is a well known idea that most of us are a little wacky (I hesitate to use the word dysfunctional) in some way or another. Maybe we don't process numbers well, or maybe we lack the skills to get along with people, but it is usually something we're a little short on. For me, it's total and almost complete lack of direction. I sometimes say about myself that I could get lost in the bathroom, and it's pretty much true. If I didn't have a compass on the rearview mirror in the car I would probably never figure out which way to go. Don't take me out in the woods like Hansel and Gretel or I probably would be out there wandering about forever.

In the past couple months or so, Tim and I were scheduled to be at a home group, sort of out in the country by Brownsburg. I had been there several times. I thought I knew which way I was going. I was following Tim, but we got separated at the stoplight. I was fairly confident I could get there on my own, and if not "thank heaven" for cell phones. 

The thing was I had driven to this particular house once before by myself and gotten lost. One good thing about my sense of direction, I'm fairly certain when I'm lost. I drove, I drove past the house or something like that, I'm not really sure where I go wrong at this point, and ended up at the same railroad crossing I had been to before when I was lost. I called Tim and he arranged to tromp through several inches of snow and stand at the end of the driveway of our friend's house and wave me in. This is the second time he's done the exact same thing. I thinking our friends need to move to a more user-friendly location.

Then in the past month or so I had several doctor's appointments at a clinic about 20 minutes away in Indianapolis. This time I knew the way there. I have been to this building at least four different times now and have only successfully negotiated the right turns only one time, the last time I was there. I always get mixed up at the stoplight on whatever that street name is, and turn the wrong way. I have ended up in the Wal-mart parking lot every time turning around to go back. I have even ended up at Wal-mart going home from the clinic. I don't know what's with me, but I guess I drive mostly by landmarks, and they never look the same going as coming. I think this girl needs help. 

My only saving grace is that I can turn around and go back. I have been in more driveways in unknown neighborhoods than I care to count. I should have a sign on my car that says, "Sorry, just passing through. Pay no attention to this car in your drive." 

So what I'm proposing is that someone in my family buy me a GPS if they ever intend to see this girl again. I would be so thankful. 

De-redding the room

We bought our house four and a half years ago. I I liked the lay-out of the inside; the outside not so much. We worked to improve the landscaping and now that is nice. It wasn't a new house. It had been lived in by a family for some part of 2 years. I think the family of three all lived here about 9 months. They lived here just long enough to put some spots on the carpet. 

When we walked in most of the inside of the house was painted the builder white. I think builders use a combo of lots of air and very little flat paint to cover the walls. The color was okay since it gave me the chance to paint everything the color that I wanted. Two rooms though definitely bore the mark of the previous owner. The family room was some sort of gold color that looked okay in the daytime but turned a horrid color at night under the incandescent lighting. That wasn't the worst of it though. There was some sort of modern design painted on the wall. It consisted of squares and other shapes, part of which looked like the real estate sign outside. I absolutely hated it, so that was the first thing to go.

"This is a nice house" I thought. Then I walked into the master bedroom. It was painted a deep red. Now I know that this was/is all the rage, but an all red room is just not for me. I like red as an accent color, but not a whole room. I might like it in the dining room or a small bathroom, but not a huge master bedroom. I thought, "Oh no, I'll have to paint this room, too." It is just now being painted. I have put it off long enough. 

The reason de-redding the room is such a bear is that the room has a cathedral ceiling along with a plant shelf up about 100 feet from the ground. Okay, it's not that far up, but it might as well be because there is no way my arms are long enough to reach over and up enough to trim the top of the wall. Lucky Tim will get to help with that part.

I have spent two days now dusting, washing, rinsing 3 of the walls, taping, all the unusual prep work, and painting on the primer to kill the red. The 4th wall will have to wait until the bed can be moved away from the wall. Many painting books and websites tell you to move out all the furniture. I ask, "To where?" I don't have a large storage shed and a king-size canopy bed and "break-your-back furniture" isn't going anywhere real fast. It's hard enough to move the furniture with those super slider thingys. The day Tim gets too feeble to lift up the furniture to put the sliders under, well I don't want to think about it! Today I will begin the more final neutral color. I hope I like it.

On those home improvement shows, I often see them painting very deep, rich colors on the walls. I shudder when a deep purple or a black color is used. No one tells these homeowners that they may tire of these deep colors very quickly (that's my case). The show host says, "If you don't like the color just repaint the room." I say, no one from those shows comes back to help you repaint anything! 

As I was applying the primer yesterday, I kept thinking, "Now why is it that I don't want this red room?" I guess the paint fumes were getting to me.

Common "common language"

What is happening to language these days? To my way of thinking it's just getting more vulgar and well, common. I grew up in a home where the occasional cuss word was heard, mostly said by my father when he was angry. When I was really young I remember more of that sort of thing, but that changed for some reason and became less and less the older I got, and I'm not sure why. Maybe he was trying to be a better example to his kids.

Cussing at home wasn't something I heard regularly. I almost never heard my mom say anything like that, and I can't remember saying many cuss words myself. I would have been eating soap if I did. For a brief period I did say the word, "crackers!" when something was frustrating me, but I sort of felt that was like wanting to say a cuss word without actually doing it, so I stopped. I have been married for 33 years to the same man and have never heard him say one single cuss word. That's amazing, and "no" he isn't a saint, and "yes" he does get angry.

To listen to people speak today, I feel totally out of it, old, or something. My standards are pretty high in this area, for secretly I also object to all words connoting bathroom functions as well. For all the education people have paid for in this country, it seems it's really hard to express yourself in good words.

I think it is odd and sort of funny that people who would be mortified to hear any religious words spoken in a school or public place, will use God's name in an irreverent way in that very place. God's name is spoken as a cuss word with the prefix of "O" by people in public more times than I would ever say even in a good way. I find that totally ironic.

Well, now to get down to it, here is the crux of this post. What is with the "b*tch" word? I hear it said all over the place. When I was younger that was one of the most vulgar words you could say to a woman. It was contemptuous, vile, and certainly a slanderous word to be flung during a horrible rage. Now everybody seems to say it to everyone else. Has this become a term of endearment? Girls say it to friends, gay guys or gals to each other and other women, boyfriends to girlfriends and girls even proudly say it about themselves. I just don't get it. What's with the dumbing down and vulgarity of our common language?

You can bet that I will hold you in higher esteem if I hear good positive words coming from your mouth. That goes for the President of the United States on down. When I point my finger at someone else though there are three of them pointing right back at me. Just in case you're feeling really guilty, I slip and mess up on a rare occasion. How I really hate that!

Never heard in church

The following is a sentence you never hear in church. "Uh, your Bible is pulling your top down." Stretchy v-neck top caught on a suede Bible cover = ROFL.

How embarrassing. Hopefully, Tim was the only one that noticed. So nice to visit our son's church on vacation.

Bump Outs make exciting driving

I laughed out loud at the sign as we passed. We were traveling in Illinois in such torrential rains that Interstate 80/94 in the Chicago area was shut down. Tim and I were on our way to a Sunday wedding and taking the slow scenic route due to the rain. We were not having a happy time.

Somewhere in the Chicago suburbs there was a sign posted that read, "No driving on the shoulder of the road." The sign itself wasn't funny, but I got tickled anyway. I said to Tim, "I guess they have some Indiana people driving over here and had to put up a sign."

Indiana drivers and roads are unique. Having moved here from a lifetime in Illinois, I noticed this phenomenon right away. It took a while to get used to it, but I have adapted. At least in our area, a suburb of Indy, no one seems to think that widening the road to at least four lanes seems to be necessary. It doesn't seem to matter that the roads are congested with traffic. No extra lanes are built. The transportation department merely creates bump outs.

I had never experienced a bump out before in Illinois. A bump out is a curved piece of road that looks like an elongated backward "c" on the right side of the road. The bump out occurs when there is a possibility of a left turn off the main road. Passing on the right in Indiana is the norm, at least where we live. The theory is that if you are making a left hand turn off a major road, the bump out will allow cars behind you to zoom past you on the right. It works fairly well, but honestly, we could use a few wider roads with more lanes.

I really don't mind the bump outs, I use them frequently. The only thing that really bugs me is that people will pass you on the right even if there isn't a bump out. They just zoom around on the shoulder of the road. Those drivers are scary, because sometimes the shoulder isn't all that wide and is right next to a deep ditch. YIKES! In fact, every time I drive to church there is a possibility that this little excitement will occur. There is no bump out for our left turn into the church parking lot.

I could see that at the location of the sign in Illinois there were nice wide blacktopped shoulders to the road. People from Indiana must surely drive in Illinois frequently and need a little reminder that not everyone drives like they're passing at the Indianapolis 500. Ya gotta love it!

It's not easy bein' green in Central Indiana

Okay, for the sake of the environment and global warming I'm trying to be a little more green, but it ain't easy. I'm not sure where I come down on the issue of global warming etc., but I do think it's my job to dress, till, and keep the earth, so I'm trying to do my small part. It might be easier elsewhere, but in Central Indiana it's hard.

On TV they give you all those great suggestions about buying more green building materials and more efficient appliances, but let's face it, the majority of us are not building houses, remodeling constantly, or replacing appliances every few days. I'll keep those things in mind when the issues come up in my home, but I think the suggestions need to be more immediately practical.

I have bought the new light bulbs, and they're okay. Okay, unless you have to actually see them in a light fixture, and then they are just dumb looking. That's just my two cents worth. I'm dreading the day when my chandelier bulbs all need replacing with the new bulbs. I think the new bulbs for those are just horrible. Maybe I should stockpile a lifetime supply of those skinny old bulbs. I'm not too thrilled with the disposal methods of the new bulbs either. Even if I dispose of them correctly, I can't see that everyone will.

I also purchased and use those reusable shopping bags. I do like them. They hold a lot more than the wimpy plastic bags and they stand up and don't let the tomatoes roam free in the trunk. Plus, they are easier to fold up and put away in my opinion.

I have two problems with the "green" bags. Sometimes I forget to take the bags into the store. I get very annoyed with myself, because usually by the time I remember, I have a cart half-full of items. I am getting better at remembering to take them out of the trunk though. The biggest drawback to the bags is that where I live I seem to be the only one using them. I never see another person in the store carrying or using their own bags. It makes me feel weird, plus it takes longer at the checkout counter because the checker has to put your bags on the staging area and shove the regular bags out of the way. I feel like the people behind me are rolling their eyes at me behind my back. I will persevere, and maybe the idea will catch on as time goes on.

The other two areas that I think are ripe for the green process for the regular person are bottled water and disposable diapers. I rarely buy bottled water, unless I'm on a road trip or something. It just doesn't seem like a good use of my money. I think bottled water became a status symbol for a while. "Hey, look at me, I'm so flush with cash that I can buy my water in a plastic bottle, and then pitch it in the garbage." I use a filtered pitcher and a reusable water bottle. It tastes just as good and according to reports that I've read, tap water is a lot more regulated for quality than bottled water.

I probably shouldn't speculate on disposable diapers since my kids are long since out of that stage. I did use them when they were little, at least part of the time. Can you just imagine the mountains of disposable diapers buried in our landfills. Yuck! I am an offender on this one even now. When my adorable little grandkids come, I use and toss the little diapers with the best of them. If the diaper is especially odoriferous I even enclose it in it's own plastic bag before tossing it in a garbage can lined with another plastic bag. Centuries from now archaeologists will probably wonder at the way we have preserved "poo poo" in our century.

Not to discount driving less, etc., here are my practical suggestions: use the new light bulbs, nix the bottled water, forget the disposable diapers, and put yourself out there and use your reusable shopping bags for all the world to see.

Wondering in the world of technology

I like computers. I use computers. I can operate the programs, and I'm not afraid to do so. Somewhere there is a disconnect between all that and understanding the real workings of the computer and other technology. Maybe it's my age bracket, but all the computer terminology is a bunch of background noise to me.

We've been shopping for a new computer lately. The old one went to meet its maker recently, or at least I wish it was back at DELL. Expensive equipment isn't supposed to just die in 3 1/2 years is it? On what other big ticket item are we supposed to shell out our hard earned cash and expect that it will be all over with in such a short time. Back in the day, it might have been the automobile. If you kept your car for three years that was a long time. Many people bought a new one yearly. Now, most cars aren't even paid off in three years.

Computer shopping left me wondering in this strange land. I'm wondering what is all this gig stuff about, how much do I need, how fast is it going to be etc, etc, etc? The bottom line is that I want something fast and reliable, something that won't explode in a big bang in the near future, and yet I won't be doing any film or music editing for the industry in the near future. Do you have something like that? It seems they do, but it's confusing. Honestly, when I go and look at TVs or computers do you know how I judge them? Strictly by the looks. You make it look good and I will buy it! Which is why I want the iMac. (I think that's the name.)

A few weeks ago my mom and I went shopping for a new flat screen TV for her. Her television from a decade ago or so died and she was watching a little 13 inch screen in her living room and complaining about it ever time I visited her. She did not really want a flat screen. They were just too expensive in her mind, but I persuaded her that they were about all she was going to find, and they weren't as expensive as they used to be.

Off we went to Best Buy. Tim and I had gone about the alien world of TVs a few years ago when the issue was plasma or LCD, their expense and all that jazz. That whole thing was so confusing that we ended up never replacing our broken TV and just using a smaller one in the family room that we already had. So, I knew a bit about TVs from that. I knew which brands I liked. I knew which size would look good and be appropriate for her viewing area. The price was good. The picture was amazing.

Then the sales people walked me over to a TV display wall to show me the benefits of having their service people come out and fine tune the color etc. WOW! it was stunning. Their service people could tone down the pinks, purples or whatever and really make the screen crystal clear. Since my mom was to have the TV delivered that might be a good thing.

Okay, how much will all this cost? So the TV with tax was under $700. Delivery charges and hauling away the old set, $60. Adjusting the set. . . $350, with $50 off if I paid for it upon purchase. I swear my jaw hit the ground. I was flabbergasted. Like I should be thrilled to have $25,000 worth of equipment sitting in mom's house adjusting the color. "Oh, and would you like the service plan, too?"

Uh, no thanks! "We'll take the TV and the delivery. Thank you very much!" I was left wondering, "Can't they make a $700 TV look decent right out of the box with maybe a few adjustments by the homeowner?" It's definitely an alien world out there for a 50+ year old.